Learning to Lose

So much to lose, and so much to be learned about loss.

Elise placed fourth in a series of races sponsored by the St. Louis Track Club. It was pretty competitive in her age group. She trained hard and diligently and set a new personal best by a significant margin. We were so proud of Elise, it was hard to watch her disappointment. She managed to regain a gracious composure by the end of the awards ceremony. After a few weeks she got out for a run and then a few weeks later asked me to sign her up for another race! She'll be running in two weeks.

Thomas has lost his two front upper teeth. He has my favorite grin now. The last snapshot of babyhood. He turned seven last week.

In two weeks the girls are also competing for a financial scholarship at the music school where we currently pay for their lessons. Both of their teachers have informed me that the scholarships are usually awarded to slightly older students, but then they signed us up anyways. I think the teachers figure it will be a beneficial experience. So we are practicing hard, but I am thinking we'll not win...

Paul and Madeleine are having teeth pulled this week. Our dentist back in Norfolk told us they needed pulling last summer and we're finally getting around to it. Paul's is an extra tooth embedded in the gum between his normal front upper teeth, keeping them apart and leaving less room for other incoming adult teeth. He'll have general anesthesia for his first surgery!

I am learning how much loss I feel in change and transition, even when I truly enjoy my new surroundings. Our dear empleada and amiga Lucia had her baby last week and made sure that we found out that same day... We had an evening with fellow students that I knew when we were all children. Remembering our church, our estranged friends who were once so close, and realizing that we are now as our parents were then... I had a wonderful, but quick, weekend in Norfolk, uanable to see enough of everyone. My six-year-old niece's sudden tears as I said goodbye... Charlie lost another uncle, his godfather Tom...